I'm so bloody sick and tired of people using the word Bully. I hate it. It's a scapegoat to hide behind, and a poor excuse to escape taking ownership of a lack of parenting.
I think that everything is just to easy now. I was bullied as a child. Like most people. It's a natural part of life to meet with aggression at some points and to learn how to deal with it. Kids will be kids. It's up to parents to be parents.
If your kid is being bullied on the internet, then she needs to not be on the internet. You can't control everyone that your child comes in contact. and you can let them run off on their own to fall on their face all the time. Reason would say that at some point you have to stop letting "your" iPad occupy your children, while the internet raises them and you watch dancing with the stars.
There were on computers when I was born. At some point in grade school we got one, and later on moved onto having the internet and limited internet time. the key word there LIMITED I was allowed to be on the computer for 1 hour.
There is no point in lying, I found some bad stuff on the internet. Natural curiosity is going to cause anyone to go looking for something thought to be taboo, for any number of reasons. But I was raised actively by two parents who spent time with me. They taught me right from wrong, so when I saw an ad that was bad, seemed like a virus or was just plain lewd, I simply viewed it as a waste of time. vulgarity was always something my mother repulsed. to this day she does not swear and scolds my 27 year old self every time I curse in her presence. I suppose in a lot of ways I had it easy. There was no internet to isolate me. and when there was, my parents had a problem with it.
It bothers me to see parents handing off their cellphone or tablet and letting the child stare, poking a touchscreen the entire time they are in a restaurant. It is not a tool to allow parents to act as though they didn't choose to become parents. It's a full-time job being a parent. It takes a lot of work. If you want a night off (as I'll be the first to say, any parent is entitled to) get a sitter and enjoy a night alone. If you want to have family dinner leave all the electronics at home and spend a couple of hours with your kids. Please don't let the internet raise your kids. It will make them stupid and obese and disappointments to you, and everyone else.
It's a task that I know, myself, I am not up to. I'm not cut out to be a parent at all, and I believe that if more people took that notion more seriously, and assessed if they were or were not able to raise a child properly, and took the proper intelligent, well known, correct methods to protect themselves, we wouldn't have such an over populated social service system, to be so underfunded. We can't increase budgets with money that we do not have. We have to decrease need to lighten the load on everything.
Showing posts with label brothers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label brothers. Show all posts
Tuesday, 26 November 2013
Tuesday, 9 April 2013
Dirty Little Secrets
So I have a confession to make. I have to admit this is very difficult for me to share, but here goes. I love romance and gestures of affection. I don't like that I do. I'm relatively feeling-less otherwise. I often fear that on some level I'm a psychopath because I honestly have very little emotional attachment to 90% of the people around me. But when it comes to the people I do care about, I cannot do enough to show them how I feel.
I talk to my family (mom, dad and brothers) at least 3 times a week. Unfortunately I live in a different city from all of them so It's really hard to see them more often than I do.
I also constantly try to go over and above to show boyfriends/partners what they mean to me. gifts, dates, cooking meals, back rubs, voicing my own feelings so they know what they mean to me.
Despite being mostly stone faced I fall very hard for people. I can usually tell in the first couple of months, If I love someone, or if I'm wasting their/my time. I guess that is part of coldness that I can appreciate. I can cut ties and be over it, fairly quickly when it becomes apparent to me that, that is, in fact, the best option.
I cry a lot. like a lot. I think that it's because I keep all my feelings hidden from the general population. I don't trust most people. So because I only share my feelings/emotions with a few select people that I do trust, they all come flooding out and it's hard to control. Like flood gates I suppose. Or trying to close a fire door, to escape when like 15 Zombies are pushing on the other side and have their stupid zombie arms are all jammed in the slightly open door. stressful to say the least.
But there is nothing that makes me happier than gestures of affection. Physical contact, words spoken, cards and simple gifts that don't cost money. Something real that I can see.
I think maybe my trust issues go deeper than I realize.
Maybe I don't even trust myself, or I just can't trust believing. I have to see it, and hear it proven, to know its not going anywhere. Which is kind of funny because I'm one of the few people I know in my age group that still hold a strong connection to my christian faith, and God. I just can't believe in people I suppose, but that shouldn't be very surprising for anyone. Humanity becomes less deserving of our faith and trust, every single day we're on the planet.
That was a bit of a rant. I had a very humbling meeting at my office today and it's causing me to reflect a lot. Now that the pity party is over, I will get back to work and stop feeling bad about myself.
Everyone needs to vent sometimes after all. If you ever need to vent, feel free to do it here. On your left. That little Ask.fm box?
<----right there!
you can tell me anything. Ask me any question you want or share any story that you think will help someone else. While I do stand by my statement that I don't have any feelings, I do have a great deal of concern for the moral fiber of our society these days, For teen girls, and everyone who has the unfortunate task of going against the grain and standing out. People who should be supported, and taught and loved. Not shunned for their individualism. Again, my personal baggage comes out here ha ha thank god growing up in a shithole with terrible people systematically killed all the feelings I had. What a mess I would be now. ha ha
Make Love and Cookies. Not War and Segregation.
<3 april
I talk to my family (mom, dad and brothers) at least 3 times a week. Unfortunately I live in a different city from all of them so It's really hard to see them more often than I do.
I also constantly try to go over and above to show boyfriends/partners what they mean to me. gifts, dates, cooking meals, back rubs, voicing my own feelings so they know what they mean to me.
Despite being mostly stone faced I fall very hard for people. I can usually tell in the first couple of months, If I love someone, or if I'm wasting their/my time. I guess that is part of coldness that I can appreciate. I can cut ties and be over it, fairly quickly when it becomes apparent to me that, that is, in fact, the best option.
I cry a lot. like a lot. I think that it's because I keep all my feelings hidden from the general population. I don't trust most people. So because I only share my feelings/emotions with a few select people that I do trust, they all come flooding out and it's hard to control. Like flood gates I suppose. Or trying to close a fire door, to escape when like 15 Zombies are pushing on the other side and have their stupid zombie arms are all jammed in the slightly open door. stressful to say the least.
But there is nothing that makes me happier than gestures of affection. Physical contact, words spoken, cards and simple gifts that don't cost money. Something real that I can see.
I think maybe my trust issues go deeper than I realize.
Maybe I don't even trust myself, or I just can't trust believing. I have to see it, and hear it proven, to know its not going anywhere. Which is kind of funny because I'm one of the few people I know in my age group that still hold a strong connection to my christian faith, and God. I just can't believe in people I suppose, but that shouldn't be very surprising for anyone. Humanity becomes less deserving of our faith and trust, every single day we're on the planet.
That was a bit of a rant. I had a very humbling meeting at my office today and it's causing me to reflect a lot. Now that the pity party is over, I will get back to work and stop feeling bad about myself.
Everyone needs to vent sometimes after all. If you ever need to vent, feel free to do it here. On your left. That little Ask.fm box?
<----right there!
you can tell me anything. Ask me any question you want or share any story that you think will help someone else. While I do stand by my statement that I don't have any feelings, I do have a great deal of concern for the moral fiber of our society these days, For teen girls, and everyone who has the unfortunate task of going against the grain and standing out. People who should be supported, and taught and loved. Not shunned for their individualism. Again, my personal baggage comes out here ha ha thank god growing up in a shithole with terrible people systematically killed all the feelings I had. What a mess I would be now. ha ha
Make Love and Cookies. Not War and Segregation.
<3 april
Sunday, 24 March 2013
Family
The reason that I have 2 brothers is entirely too complicated. Well one just came from the regular way. that shouldn't be too difficult to get your head around. He's 3 years younger than I am and he's awesome. It has to be related to DNA or something.
It doesn't make sense to a lot of people, but my family are very warm, community oriented people. They don't value things, but people. and the value they add to your life, for having them there. If it isn't already obvious, I was raised by hardworking but idealistic hippies. I'm so grateful for that, you really have no idea.
When I was 10, New neighbors moved in next door. An adorable young couple, expecting their first baby in 7 or 8 months. (a fetus that would become one of the two loves of my life).
He made friends with my dad. Doing dad things, fishing, going to the cabin, and the like. I would go over and hang out with her. Help her with the baby. He was beautiful. right from the first moment everyone saw him.
She and my mom got along but were not really on the same level. She was a little younger than my mom. A passionate and lovely native Woman. My mother being a fearless, strong Newfoundland woman, I think she was just a little too emotional or dramatic for my mother to really relate to her. But they were both so sweet and lovely that they always remained friends.
So after years of this family friendship. The kids growing, New Years spent watching fireworks, Bbq's in the back yard. Funny memories made that are still shared today, my phone rings at 9 am. The young dad was suddenly faced with his time to leave this world. By that time, I had come to realize that the young boy who grew up in my back yard, relied on me for a lot of things. I found myself so proud of the young man he was growing into. Smart, and Careful. Quickly becoming an inspiration for a whole group of people, and giving them a voice. He was a member of my family and I had a hand in the values that he had, and how he viewed himself. So when people are who he is, this beautiful, tall native boy, standing next to pale kid me, I tell them he is my little brother. Sometimes I'll feature pieces by him. He's a fantastic, opinionated writer and he stirs the pot quite nicely. My family and friends are everything to me. If you disrespect them, we probably wont have much interaction. the most important people in that group are my brothers.
It doesn't make sense to a lot of people, but my family are very warm, community oriented people. They don't value things, but people. and the value they add to your life, for having them there. If it isn't already obvious, I was raised by hardworking but idealistic hippies. I'm so grateful for that, you really have no idea.
When I was 10, New neighbors moved in next door. An adorable young couple, expecting their first baby in 7 or 8 months. (a fetus that would become one of the two loves of my life).
He made friends with my dad. Doing dad things, fishing, going to the cabin, and the like. I would go over and hang out with her. Help her with the baby. He was beautiful. right from the first moment everyone saw him.
She and my mom got along but were not really on the same level. She was a little younger than my mom. A passionate and lovely native Woman. My mother being a fearless, strong Newfoundland woman, I think she was just a little too emotional or dramatic for my mother to really relate to her. But they were both so sweet and lovely that they always remained friends.
So after years of this family friendship. The kids growing, New Years spent watching fireworks, Bbq's in the back yard. Funny memories made that are still shared today, my phone rings at 9 am. The young dad was suddenly faced with his time to leave this world. By that time, I had come to realize that the young boy who grew up in my back yard, relied on me for a lot of things. I found myself so proud of the young man he was growing into. Smart, and Careful. Quickly becoming an inspiration for a whole group of people, and giving them a voice. He was a member of my family and I had a hand in the values that he had, and how he viewed himself. So when people are who he is, this beautiful, tall native boy, standing next to pale kid me, I tell them he is my little brother. Sometimes I'll feature pieces by him. He's a fantastic, opinionated writer and he stirs the pot quite nicely. My family and friends are everything to me. If you disrespect them, we probably wont have much interaction. the most important people in that group are my brothers.
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