I'd like to say that I will never understand people that need to gossip, and pass around negativity.
But I do.
Insecurity is a powerful thing. I can completely understand how someone in a position that they are not happy in, has to work so hard at cutting other people down, and doing awful things to them.
It's sad, and a little messed up.
Instead of bettering yourself, which takes actual work, and a lot of character, I do completely understand how someone with not a lot going for them, would pass on doing that work, and concentrate on bringing someone they're intimidated by, down to their level.
It's easier. and Lord knows The Worthless hate work, or taking responsibility for themselves.
Except it doesn't really work out.
When people continue to pass you by, while you stay in the same dead end space, trolling and hating, it's hard to see all the flaws in them, and not pick up on the flaws in the person with nothing going for them, continuously running their mouth, or looking for things to gossip about.
It's truly depressing that our generation has such little self worth. Maybe if they'd had a better life, or better parents, or more discipline, or even more importance put on education or character, they would chose the (obviously) more enlightened path.
Maybe they wouldn't act like worthless wastes of space, until that's all anyone thought of, at the mention of their name.
If your unhappy in your life, change it. It isn't anyone's problem but yours
If you've had a rough childhood, or someone was mean to you, get the fuck over yourself. your not special.
I would say that 95% of people have not had a perfect life. Your just like everyone else, except everyone else is smart enough, and strong enough to deal with their shit, and not let it dictate their lives. I occasionally go out to see a band I like, and it kills me, that you can walk into at least four different bars downtown, and all the same bar rats from 5 years ago are still there. I may go to a bar once or twice a month, and I see the same faces, except now they look much sadder, and weathered. Still telling me all about their new band, as if it's not exactly the same as their last shitty band that isn't going anywhere. Every. Single, Time, While most of us moved on, grew up, and got on with the progress of our lives, and I'm not talking about staff. or bar owners. clearly they would sustain a business.
I mean the people with nothing else to do, nowhere else to be, than sitting at a bar, or home on their computer, shooting shit and generally being a worthless hater.
People who watch their friends grow up, move on, find relationships, healthy routines and mature with their life, and just move on to the next slightly younger/dumber group of friends. Then they evolve past you, and you stay where you are, waiting for new people who don't know your tired, pathetic game yet.
I feel bad for these people. Clearly they are not living up to any kind of potential whatsoever, so their defensive. The thing they need to realize is, they don't have to defend themselves. Because nobody is even talking about them, People who only breed negativity, label themselves so the rest of society soon realizes they are counter productive, and forgets all about them. The only time these people get mentioned, is in the piteous tone, of understanding, and sadness that people like this exist.
Showing posts with label on my own. Show all posts
Showing posts with label on my own. Show all posts
Sunday, 11 October 2015
The Worst Diet
I sometimes think about how thin I used to be.
When trying on clothes at the mall is discouraging, or the level of takeout in my diet is embarrassing, I immediately wish for the body that I had 6 years ago.
When trying on clothes at the mall is discouraging, or the level of takeout in my diet is embarrassing, I immediately wish for the body that I had 6 years ago.
The body that I had when I had no money for groceries because I had accumulated so much debt, wasting money, drinking and being stupid, that the truly impressive amount of money I was making waiting tables and bartending, was eaten up by debt, bills, and the aforementioned stupidity.
The body that I had when I was in an abusive, unhealthy relationship. When I was up arguing all night long, and sleeping all day, and doing too much for an unhealthy person in denial about their issues.
The body I had, when I was isolated, and didn't have any friends. Nobody to invite me to dinner, or to go shopping with. Nobody to show me nerdy card/board/video games, and make me feel good about myself. When I was so pestered by people looking to troll and make my life miserable that I literally wanted to die, instead of go out to socialize ad give them any more ammunition
The body that I had, when I spent a lot time answering for my behavior. Explaining where I was, and trying desperately to prove that I wasn't "another dumb slutty girl, who lies to guys, and manipulates them".
I made very bad decisions because I didn't value myself.
I took in the negative things people said to me, and about me, and I let that dictate my life.
I was not strong enough to be smart, or even comfortable with being alone, therefore I was chronically depressed. .
But now I know I'm not stupid. Now there is no way someone could make me feel stupid.
In a moment of weakness, I always wish for the body I had six years ago, but I remember the life, medical health, and financial profile (or lack thereof) that came with it.
I think this goes for everyone.
When things are not what you want them to be, I find it helpful to think of where you've been. How far you've come, and the progress you've made in your life. The contribution you make to the lives of others. Everything that would be missing without you right now.
When you look at the big picture, 5 pounds seems to be a silly thing to cry over, in your car.
Eat Healthy. Get Active. Get More Sleep. Love Yourself.
Tuesday, 8 September 2015
Aging Ungracefully.
My neck hurts. The closer I get to being 30, the easier it seems to be, to hurt myself, without even understanding how. I have no idea how I hurt my neck. I spent most of last night tossing and turning, trying to find a position that didn't send shooting pain, up into my brain, and down my back. As a result, I'm home, taking a sick day, to enjoy the headache and radiating pain, in the privacy of my own home.
Getting older is lame. When your a kid, all you want to do is be an adult. what's the appeal? You can eat cookies whenever you want to, stay up as late as you want, and buy alcohol. But nobody tells you that your metabolism kicks out around 25, and your body rejects being awake after 10:30pm, shortly after that.
So now your in your 30's. Enjoying a michelob ultra (watching those carbs now), at 9pm before starting a 45 minute skin care routine. You fall into your bed exhausted because now you wake up at 6:30 every day, like some barn yard animal.
Half your friends have trades, so they work on shifts. 5 days on, 5 days off, etc. You and more of your friends work a regular 9-5. Others are still in school, because none of us really know what we wanted to be when we grew up.
So you can't coordinate your schedules or any disposable income to socialize, or see each other. For a lot of us, the appeal of drinking is gone once you can do it freely and legally. If your a petite body type like myself, you may realize that your really bad at alcohol, and opt to not really drink all that often. So that avenue of socializing is out.
Even if you could get everyone on the same page, everyone is so tired and plagued by social anxieties and other mental health issues that nobody wants to leave their house anyway.
Don't misunderstand me. I hated being a teenager. High school was a nightmare, and I'm very satisfied living on my own terms, in my own lifestyle. But with friends you can't see, Money you can't spend and time you can't waste, it's a sad state of affairs that is only slightly better than living in your parent's basement.
When you consider having someone else do your laundry, cooking your meals, and do your grocery shopping, it's a small wonder that any of us ever left at all. How old is too old to move back in with your parents?
Getting older is lame. When your a kid, all you want to do is be an adult. what's the appeal? You can eat cookies whenever you want to, stay up as late as you want, and buy alcohol. But nobody tells you that your metabolism kicks out around 25, and your body rejects being awake after 10:30pm, shortly after that.
So now your in your 30's. Enjoying a michelob ultra (watching those carbs now), at 9pm before starting a 45 minute skin care routine. You fall into your bed exhausted because now you wake up at 6:30 every day, like some barn yard animal.
Half your friends have trades, so they work on shifts. 5 days on, 5 days off, etc. You and more of your friends work a regular 9-5. Others are still in school, because none of us really know what we wanted to be when we grew up.
So you can't coordinate your schedules or any disposable income to socialize, or see each other. For a lot of us, the appeal of drinking is gone once you can do it freely and legally. If your a petite body type like myself, you may realize that your really bad at alcohol, and opt to not really drink all that often. So that avenue of socializing is out.
Even if you could get everyone on the same page, everyone is so tired and plagued by social anxieties and other mental health issues that nobody wants to leave their house anyway.
Don't misunderstand me. I hated being a teenager. High school was a nightmare, and I'm very satisfied living on my own terms, in my own lifestyle. But with friends you can't see, Money you can't spend and time you can't waste, it's a sad state of affairs that is only slightly better than living in your parent's basement.
When you consider having someone else do your laundry, cooking your meals, and do your grocery shopping, it's a small wonder that any of us ever left at all. How old is too old to move back in with your parents?
Thursday, 27 February 2014
Speaking Greek
I've failed on the blog front pretty bad. Boyfriend is out of the province and I promised myself I would make use of the time alone to change some things that I want to. I've put a lot of time into work and its really paying off. I've been eating really well, and getting a mild amount of exercise and as a result, I am feeling pretty great too.
I guess I find it easier to writing, when I'm unhappy. Complaining comes more naturally to me I guess.
Not that, that makes me any different, I'm sure it's a general humanity kind of thing.
I'm thinking of trying to learn Greek with Rosetta Stone. I work in a Greek restaurant for Greek people. If that weren't enough of a reason to learn a new language, Boyfriend and I are planning a trip to Greece in the near future. Just seems like something that will make my life easier in the future.
I guess I find it easier to writing, when I'm unhappy. Complaining comes more naturally to me I guess.
Not that, that makes me any different, I'm sure it's a general humanity kind of thing.
I'm thinking of trying to learn Greek with Rosetta Stone. I work in a Greek restaurant for Greek people. If that weren't enough of a reason to learn a new language, Boyfriend and I are planning a trip to Greece in the near future. Just seems like something that will make my life easier in the future.
Wednesday, 29 January 2014
Job Prospects
So I'm newly handling the social media for the restaurant where I work. They're interacting and sharing on Twitter as @mamasoulasnl and can be reached via email at mamasoulasnl@gmail.com. admittedly a little grass roots but it's a start, and that is generally the most complicated and difficult step. I've been passively promoting them via my own personal Facebook and Twitter accounts since before Christmas and have noticed a considerable difference in consistency.
It was very nice to present my ideas with some minor results to back it up. I don't have a fancy Media Manager title just yet but I'm realizing how lucrative it is to be a little ambitious when you see an opportunity. Maybe I'll work up the nerve to ask for that after I have a few months worth of positive results to show for my efforts.
If you're on Twitter follow Mama Soula's and myself (@obviouslyADL) to keep up to date, and share info with your friends and followers. You're St. John's Friends will thank you :)
It was very nice to present my ideas with some minor results to back it up. I don't have a fancy Media Manager title just yet but I'm realizing how lucrative it is to be a little ambitious when you see an opportunity. Maybe I'll work up the nerve to ask for that after I have a few months worth of positive results to show for my efforts.
If you're on Twitter follow Mama Soula's and myself (@obviouslyADL) to keep up to date, and share info with your friends and followers. You're St. John's Friends will thank you :)
Monday, 23 September 2013
a tiny amount of growth maybe
Yesterday was a very interesting day for me.
I should back up a little. I recently accepted a role in a community theatre version of August: Osage County. which I am very excited about. It's a very well written play and the director seems to really know her stuff. I'm very optimistic.
So yesterday I get an email that is CC'd to the entire cast. and I notice some names on the list I've worked with before a couple friends and people that I think are really great actors. One of the names however is one of the most insufferable old bitches I've ever had the unfortunate luck of meeting.
Now a very short time ago, this would have ruined my entire day. Knowing that I'd have to spend a lot of my free time with people who's had a negative impact on my life. but yesterday it didn't seem to bother me so much.
So I go to work and the charming little girl who I mentioned as my Manager (From the Insurance Company, in an earlier post called Day One) For any one who won't bother to check back, I wrote to her trying to set up a meeting to return my things and resign. She wrote me back firing me on the spot, without letting me leave on my own. It was very unfair and hurtful but proved that I didn't want to be the kind of person that likes selling Life Insurance to senior citizens on fixed incomes, Or is really good at it. It takes a shitty person to do business that way. Someone who actually claimed to be dead inside with no conscience. What a gift, to be so self aware, at such a young age.
Anyway the Ice Queen comes to the counter, with her fake insurance sales smile and says
"Hey Missus! Haven't seen you in ages. You're working here now are you??"
I had to walk away to get change for a guy, but was very happy to leave before I burst into laughter The last thing she said to me was that I was fired. via text message. This class act is so simple that she can't even remember a couple of months ago.
I couldn't help but find it funny that she was legitimately pretending nothing happened and was acting as though we were old friends.
"haven't seen you in ages"
of course you haven't seen me? I tried to sit down with you and you fired me. Where would you see me?
Later the same day, I go out to eat at a new restaurant, downtown. One of the few people that I will never ever speak to again, is sitting 4 tables away staring at me, not unlike the slow-witted Goldfish, while I eat, my broccoli. Again, this would have ruined my mood a couple of years ago. But I looked up and said "well...it's just raining bitches today" and we laughed and went about our date.
Now generally a day that is just teeming with unintelligent, hurt filled people would have sent me home to cry in my bed. I've come to realize that throughout my life, females in my life have betrayed me, abused me and disregarded and disrespected me as a person. While I know it's unreasonable like everyone else, I cannot change or help my feelings.
I'm afraid of girls.
This day, however I thought it was so funny. What are the odds of three awful people in one day? I feel like that may be a little progress, however shallow of inconsequential it may be to anyone else. Other people don't affect my happiness anymore. At least they affect it a lot less.
I should back up a little. I recently accepted a role in a community theatre version of August: Osage County. which I am very excited about. It's a very well written play and the director seems to really know her stuff. I'm very optimistic.
So yesterday I get an email that is CC'd to the entire cast. and I notice some names on the list I've worked with before a couple friends and people that I think are really great actors. One of the names however is one of the most insufferable old bitches I've ever had the unfortunate luck of meeting.
Now a very short time ago, this would have ruined my entire day. Knowing that I'd have to spend a lot of my free time with people who's had a negative impact on my life. but yesterday it didn't seem to bother me so much.
So I go to work and the charming little girl who I mentioned as my Manager (From the Insurance Company, in an earlier post called Day One) For any one who won't bother to check back, I wrote to her trying to set up a meeting to return my things and resign. She wrote me back firing me on the spot, without letting me leave on my own. It was very unfair and hurtful but proved that I didn't want to be the kind of person that likes selling Life Insurance to senior citizens on fixed incomes, Or is really good at it. It takes a shitty person to do business that way. Someone who actually claimed to be dead inside with no conscience. What a gift, to be so self aware, at such a young age.
Anyway the Ice Queen comes to the counter, with her fake insurance sales smile and says
"Hey Missus! Haven't seen you in ages. You're working here now are you??"
I had to walk away to get change for a guy, but was very happy to leave before I burst into laughter The last thing she said to me was that I was fired. via text message. This class act is so simple that she can't even remember a couple of months ago.
I couldn't help but find it funny that she was legitimately pretending nothing happened and was acting as though we were old friends.
"haven't seen you in ages"
of course you haven't seen me? I tried to sit down with you and you fired me. Where would you see me?
Later the same day, I go out to eat at a new restaurant, downtown. One of the few people that I will never ever speak to again, is sitting 4 tables away staring at me, not unlike the slow-witted Goldfish, while I eat, my broccoli. Again, this would have ruined my mood a couple of years ago. But I looked up and said "well...it's just raining bitches today" and we laughed and went about our date.
Now generally a day that is just teeming with unintelligent, hurt filled people would have sent me home to cry in my bed. I've come to realize that throughout my life, females in my life have betrayed me, abused me and disregarded and disrespected me as a person. While I know it's unreasonable like everyone else, I cannot change or help my feelings.
I'm afraid of girls.
This day, however I thought it was so funny. What are the odds of three awful people in one day? I feel like that may be a little progress, however shallow of inconsequential it may be to anyone else. Other people don't affect my happiness anymore. At least they affect it a lot less.
Monday, 24 June 2013
job hunt revival
So after a couple of weeks of working 4 hour shifts and wasting a lot of my time. The health food store tells me that I'm not a good fit and they wont be asking me to work any more shifts. I'm a lovely person though. Lovely enough to pay me little to nothing and waste my time, while bills pile up and debts increase. I guess the lesson I should be learning from this is "people who treat others that way with such little regard on not people I want to work for. She also emailed me at 6pm on a Sunday. Professional I know. Not even enough regard to have a phone call about it. I know I should be happy that they made their treatment of people clear before I was committed to that place, and they probably did me a favor. but right now I'm just upset and being a girl about it for a day. I'm at a total loss for what I did wrong. I loved it there. I loved helping customers and my favorite thing to do to pass the time was to put away all the stock so my pregnant boss didn't have to. I still have no idea what I did wrong. I was 20 minutes early most days. parked in the parking lot waiting for the owner to get there. One day I was late because Bagel Cafe tool a long time to bring us our food/bill. and I called her right away and apologized profusely and it was the only time I've ever been anything other than early.
Now the job hunt continues. The bills aren't going anywhere. I really loved my last bar tending job. but a difficult manager made it a less than good situation. I wish I could go back there. the staff there were my friends and I liked them
Now the job hunt continues. The bills aren't going anywhere. I really loved my last bar tending job. but a difficult manager made it a less than good situation. I wish I could go back there. the staff there were my friends and I liked them
Sunday, 21 April 2013
Shopping tips for Cars, Shopping online and buying in St. John's!
I've been distracted. I bought a new car this week. Buying a new car takes a surprising amount of time, and hustling. I'm so street that it wasn't an issue but here are some tips for buying a new car
1. Don't commit to anything.
2. Be honest. Don't try to play games or have a bidding war. thats just stupid
3. When you find a car that you like, Get a print out of your estimate.
4. Do not commit to anything. Tell your salesmen that you have some research to do and you need time to think about it
5. Show your estimate to EVERYONE. I brought mine to my dad, my boyfriend and a friend who's dad is a car salesmen. All people who knew far more about buying new cars than me.
6. Tell your salesmen the truth. For me it went a lot like this. But I'm an actor and over dramatic so it was practically work-shopped first...
"Well i brought my estimate to some people who were more knowledgeable than i am, and they seemed to think it was really high. I have a problem now because I really love this car, but knowing there are more affordable ones out there, that would budget better, puts me in a tough place"
The car started out being 27, 000 paid over 7 years at 2% financing.. I paid 24, 008, over 5 years with 0% financing by the time I drove my new car home. but like I said. I'm a hustler
I also got $500 off the actual car price, and a $500 gas card from North Atlantic/Petrol Canada.
More Shopping tips! Buying online is nothing to be scared of. but no matter where you buy, big or expensive purchases can be very intimidating. Here are some general tips I've learned along the way
1. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS KNOWING YOU DO NOT KNOW EVERYTHING!!!
The internet is an amazingly powerful tool. WHEN BUYING ANYTHING you should research the hell out of it. Use Google, use Ask.com, and any other site that has a search bar!
2. Look for Consumer reviews. Websites like Angie's List and Amazon Canada has a lot of customer reviews. If there is anywhere that passive aggressive hate will be shared. it's usually pretty clear in reviews to pick up on trends.
HOWEVER
One person complaining or giving something a bad rating doesn't mean its bad. It means that person wasn't satisfied. If you've ever worked customer service in your life you know what idiots leave a store, and go home to rant like a big man, on the internet. If you see a lot of people complaining about an issue, it may be a problem.
3. Compare brands and read labels. DO YOUR HOMEWORK.
Marketing is designed to be deceiving in some cases, for companies to remain competitive, and salespeople are paid via commission. they are working for you, so don't let them bully you. Be direct and don't be rushed into buying anything. It's their job to get you excited about your product so you cant say no. It's your job to get them excited about the sale, so they can't say no. Their time is an investment they have to make. This is coming from a salesperson. I sell life insurance and I do very well. But there are people who do a lot better, by being a lot less honest. I'm happy to take the pay cut and have integrity.
the last thing I have to share is that this salesperson, who sold me my vehicle was very very good. His name is Tom, at Hickman Motors on Kenmount Road on St. John's NL. He put me in a beautiful new Chevy Sonic with all the features I wanted and I left with a great price, for a great term and a very satisfying experience. I also have $100 Chevrolet gift cards available for anyone in the market for a new car, that you plan on buying at Hickman. Great service and amazing customer attention. I'm easy to contact, but I think I only have 3-5 tags for the giftcard!
1. Don't commit to anything.
2. Be honest. Don't try to play games or have a bidding war. thats just stupid
3. When you find a car that you like, Get a print out of your estimate.
4. Do not commit to anything. Tell your salesmen that you have some research to do and you need time to think about it
5. Show your estimate to EVERYONE. I brought mine to my dad, my boyfriend and a friend who's dad is a car salesmen. All people who knew far more about buying new cars than me.
6. Tell your salesmen the truth. For me it went a lot like this. But I'm an actor and over dramatic so it was practically work-shopped first...
"Well i brought my estimate to some people who were more knowledgeable than i am, and they seemed to think it was really high. I have a problem now because I really love this car, but knowing there are more affordable ones out there, that would budget better, puts me in a tough place"
The car started out being 27, 000 paid over 7 years at 2% financing.. I paid 24, 008, over 5 years with 0% financing by the time I drove my new car home. but like I said. I'm a hustler
I also got $500 off the actual car price, and a $500 gas card from North Atlantic/Petrol Canada.
More Shopping tips! Buying online is nothing to be scared of. but no matter where you buy, big or expensive purchases can be very intimidating. Here are some general tips I've learned along the way
1. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS KNOWING YOU DO NOT KNOW EVERYTHING!!!
The internet is an amazingly powerful tool. WHEN BUYING ANYTHING you should research the hell out of it. Use Google, use Ask.com, and any other site that has a search bar!
2. Look for Consumer reviews. Websites like Angie's List and Amazon Canada has a lot of customer reviews. If there is anywhere that passive aggressive hate will be shared. it's usually pretty clear in reviews to pick up on trends.
HOWEVER
One person complaining or giving something a bad rating doesn't mean its bad. It means that person wasn't satisfied. If you've ever worked customer service in your life you know what idiots leave a store, and go home to rant like a big man, on the internet. If you see a lot of people complaining about an issue, it may be a problem.
3. Compare brands and read labels. DO YOUR HOMEWORK.
Marketing is designed to be deceiving in some cases, for companies to remain competitive, and salespeople are paid via commission. they are working for you, so don't let them bully you. Be direct and don't be rushed into buying anything. It's their job to get you excited about your product so you cant say no. It's your job to get them excited about the sale, so they can't say no. Their time is an investment they have to make. This is coming from a salesperson. I sell life insurance and I do very well. But there are people who do a lot better, by being a lot less honest. I'm happy to take the pay cut and have integrity.
the last thing I have to share is that this salesperson, who sold me my vehicle was very very good. His name is Tom, at Hickman Motors on Kenmount Road on St. John's NL. He put me in a beautiful new Chevy Sonic with all the features I wanted and I left with a great price, for a great term and a very satisfying experience. I also have $100 Chevrolet gift cards available for anyone in the market for a new car, that you plan on buying at Hickman. Great service and amazing customer attention. I'm easy to contact, but I think I only have 3-5 tags for the giftcard!
Friday, 22 March 2013
Deciding where to build your own ceiling
I realized recently that I want to build and design my own home. really really badly. In an earlier post I talked about wanting money and security and all of those things, and I think what really happened is that I grew up a little bit recently. I've gotten better at loving myself, and thus I decided on goals that will give me the level of comfort in my life that I deserve. At some point, that I simply cannot put my finger on, I matured, and wanted to be an adult. I stopped being scared that I was missing everything. I wanted the world for myself, and felt motivation to improve my life for nothing other than my own happiness. The hardest step you will ever have to take in any endeavor is the first one. Nothing will ever be more difficult than that. So at some point we all just have to (wo)man up and view the world (as well as ourselves), through the more life experienced adults we all become. There is no point in being upset about getting older. We all do. Want to stay looking young. Smoking and Stress are the two most common causes of aged skin. So relax. Respect everyone. Especially yourself. Be healthy and decide which path you want to be on, then just live and let live. It's the easiest way to stay young forever.
Also Ask me anything at HundredThousandMistakes and Like hindsight. on Facebook
Also Ask me anything at HundredThousandMistakes and Like hindsight. on Facebook
Thursday, 14 March 2013
video killed the industry
So I have made a couple of significant changes this week. A lot is happening. My apologies for not being around.
I began my career on Monday Morning. I'm now an Independent Insurance Agent working for AIL. Selling Life, accident and Cancer insurance, among other kinds. I'm working with people to find ways to meet their needs and provide for themselves and it feels amazing. Selling Insurance doesn't sound like it woulds be very exciting. But it sort of is. My Co Workers are amazing. My office is here in town, I work whenever I want and I have an extensive, very generous benefits program. I have picked out one of the policies that my company offers, for myself and I'm providing for my whole life, at a very affordable cost because I'm so young.
It's a very exciting position to be in, but it was in no way easy. My education began with a 21 day online program. Paid for by my employer. Which ended with a multiple choice evaluation, of 140 questions. I'm not trying to slight this exam at all. It costs $100 to do. My company also paid that for the first one, and that exam was so horrifying that I left the exam room feeling violated. I scored 54% on the $100 Free Exam. I needed 60%. I wanted to cry, but I didn't. I just went and booked the second one. paid the $100 myself, and wrote it again in two weeks.
2 days later I was at the Confederation Building having my licence processed and given to me. Tuesday and Wednesday, After some training, Jenn took me out in the field with her. We drove to Old Shop and New Harbour, meeting clients and helping them find solutions to their concerns.
People are always so relieved and relaxed after they take care of this stuff. Nobody wants to think about getting older. it's depressing, when you have so much left that you want to do. But making some arrangements now so you (or your family) don't have to in the future is one of the most affordable, important, generous things you can do for your family and loved ones.
So many people lay awake at night, with a seriously ill parent, and worries about their parents, and their own families being in this unfortunate, devastating position.
That's what it comes down to for me. I've never slept well. I can't fall asleep well, i don't stay asleep, and when I wake up I have a hard time getting back to sleep. My mind races. It's mainly the fault of an onset anxiety disorder that I possess. Jealous right?
But there are other people who go to sleep a little easier because of the work I do. Because i care and and I'm a sensitive person so I can't help but attach myself to my work a little. Maybe that is wrong. or stupid. But maybe it means that i actually care, and I have a conscience and that will make me really really good at it.
I've worked in a lot of industries that were much too rough for me. Partially because I used to think that at some point I felt I had to. That it was everyone's duty to do something that was difficult for someone other than yourself. That was being a human being, and finding another human being to love.. I still believe people owe it to the world to be kind to each other and to strive for peace and harmony. that will never change. but I didn't have to do it, like I thought I did. I think I just had to prove to myself that I could do all those things. I had to prove to myself that while I wanted a comfortable life, I didn't need one to be happy. But my goodness it helps.
Nobody ever put more pressure on me than I put on myself. In every aspect of my life. That is a flaw I will be working to fix, probably for the rest of my life. Thank God I have an amazing insurance package*.
My ideal job is based on morals, and acting in good conscience, and talking with people. It's connecting with people and adding to the value of their life. It's a lot easier to fall asleep at night knowing you made it easier for a few other people around the city to fall asleep that night. if you look hard enough. You will always find what you are looking for. You just have to make sure your looking for the right things.
*PROTIP: buy insurance when you're young. it costs pennies on the dollar (literally) and you'll never lose it. Invest in yourself, and others will too.
I began my career on Monday Morning. I'm now an Independent Insurance Agent working for AIL. Selling Life, accident and Cancer insurance, among other kinds. I'm working with people to find ways to meet their needs and provide for themselves and it feels amazing. Selling Insurance doesn't sound like it woulds be very exciting. But it sort of is. My Co Workers are amazing. My office is here in town, I work whenever I want and I have an extensive, very generous benefits program. I have picked out one of the policies that my company offers, for myself and I'm providing for my whole life, at a very affordable cost because I'm so young.
It's a very exciting position to be in, but it was in no way easy. My education began with a 21 day online program. Paid for by my employer. Which ended with a multiple choice evaluation, of 140 questions. I'm not trying to slight this exam at all. It costs $100 to do. My company also paid that for the first one, and that exam was so horrifying that I left the exam room feeling violated. I scored 54% on the $100 Free Exam. I needed 60%. I wanted to cry, but I didn't. I just went and booked the second one. paid the $100 myself, and wrote it again in two weeks.
2 days later I was at the Confederation Building having my licence processed and given to me. Tuesday and Wednesday, After some training, Jenn took me out in the field with her. We drove to Old Shop and New Harbour, meeting clients and helping them find solutions to their concerns.
People are always so relieved and relaxed after they take care of this stuff. Nobody wants to think about getting older. it's depressing, when you have so much left that you want to do. But making some arrangements now so you (or your family) don't have to in the future is one of the most affordable, important, generous things you can do for your family and loved ones.
So many people lay awake at night, with a seriously ill parent, and worries about their parents, and their own families being in this unfortunate, devastating position.
That's what it comes down to for me. I've never slept well. I can't fall asleep well, i don't stay asleep, and when I wake up I have a hard time getting back to sleep. My mind races. It's mainly the fault of an onset anxiety disorder that I possess. Jealous right?
But there are other people who go to sleep a little easier because of the work I do. Because i care and and I'm a sensitive person so I can't help but attach myself to my work a little. Maybe that is wrong. or stupid. But maybe it means that i actually care, and I have a conscience and that will make me really really good at it.
I've worked in a lot of industries that were much too rough for me. Partially because I used to think that at some point I felt I had to. That it was everyone's duty to do something that was difficult for someone other than yourself. That was being a human being, and finding another human being to love.. I still believe people owe it to the world to be kind to each other and to strive for peace and harmony. that will never change. but I didn't have to do it, like I thought I did. I think I just had to prove to myself that I could do all those things. I had to prove to myself that while I wanted a comfortable life, I didn't need one to be happy. But my goodness it helps.
Nobody ever put more pressure on me than I put on myself. In every aspect of my life. That is a flaw I will be working to fix, probably for the rest of my life. Thank God I have an amazing insurance package*.
My ideal job is based on morals, and acting in good conscience, and talking with people. It's connecting with people and adding to the value of their life. It's a lot easier to fall asleep at night knowing you made it easier for a few other people around the city to fall asleep that night. if you look hard enough. You will always find what you are looking for. You just have to make sure your looking for the right things.
*PROTIP: buy insurance when you're young. it costs pennies on the dollar (literally) and you'll never lose it. Invest in yourself, and others will too.
Wednesday, 6 March 2013
Formspring Question #11
Formspring asks: What's the bravest thing you've ever done?
I usually have a hard time deciding if the things I'm doing are brave or just really stupid.
I guess the thing that comes to mind is staying in St. John's and living on my own after my ex and I broke up.
We had been together for 3 years. I moved to the city not knowing anyone, to live with him and be with him. naturally it all fell apart. But I stayed. I had to prove to myself that i could do it on my own.
For a long time i had 2 jobs. at times 3. But for the last 5 years I've lived on my own. in my own apartment. My bills are in my name, and i'm responsible for myself. Nobody can take that away from me. Bad things happen to everyone. Too many people think it justifies them to be bitter, and dwell on things. You can't depend on anyone in this world to pick you up. it's not their job. It's yours. Everyone is responsible for their own happiness. People who dwell on bad things, and fill themselves with hate, and insecurity, never learn to trust again, and that is nobodies fault but their own. Writing this post is another one of those things, that i can't decide between Brave or Stupid on. Thank you for your question, Please keep the conversation going at HundredThousandMistakes
The only part that still irks me is he got the Wii. We bought it together and I took the bed, so all's fair. I was just really close to finishing Paper Mario Wii when shit hit the fan...
<3HundredThousand
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