Season's Greetings. Some Simple things to keep in mind.

Season's Greetings

There seems to be some confusion. I hear people when I'm out shopping, or when at work, at a variety of places over the years, and more often than not it's proudly and loudly sworn,

“I WILL say 'Merry Christmas'!, or “Canada is a Free Country, and I can say whatever I believe, whenever I believe it”, or some variation of these declaration. Other people complain that they “have” to say 'Happy Holidays' at their job or public gathering place so as not to offend anyone, because we're all so concerned with political correctness. This may or may not be an issue with our society, that is absolutely worth looking at. I don't think it's a good excuse for claiming that your arm has been twisted, over the matter. How old do we have to get before “peer pressure” becomes legitimately unflattering?

Here is the thing, though..

If you're a Christian, or any other faith for that matter, and you want to offer kind words to another person, why not make more of an effort to be extra nice and polite at the grocery store, or saying goodbye to a particularly great server, at a restaurant.

Generally being attentive and nice for any number of reasons, are great, for spreading holiday cheer, and lightening the mood of the people in your community.

But this is where it gets tricky.

It has nothing to do with you.

You do have the right to say whatever you want. Holding your own beliefs, and having the opportunity to celebrate your beliefs, is exactly what makes Canada so amazing for everyone.

But Kindness is not about you. It's about the person your being kind too. So really your beliefs don't matter in this particular situation.

So what if you are choosing to do something kind, for someone around you, and you don't know what faith they celebrate, or how to choose your words to honour it. Isn't it simply courteous to show your kindness, along with your concern for their feelings, and your respect, by simply saying 'Have a Great Weekend!', or 'Happy Holiday's'.

How does it take away from your own personal beliefs, or devalue the way you celebrate the season, to show enough respect and humility, to be able to wish the best for anyone who might cross your path, regardless of their race, belief or the colour of their skin. This is no more right, than not understanding why the video below is shared with this blog post.

Baby

Everyone self medicates.
If you've had a bad day, and you grab your favorite greasy fast food.
I love a JBC meal from Wendy's with a Large full sugar root beer, with Chili Cheese Fries. There is something very satisfying about eating something extra delicious and extra bad for you.
Who hasn't come home from a particularly disheartening shift at work and rush to a joint, a tall, neat whiskey, or a large glass of red wine.
Tons of women, and men, act like bitchy little children, at some (admittedly humiliating) moment in their life. Almost everyone has drawn on the differences of another person, and made cruel fun of them, to compensate for their own insecurities and hang ups, at the expense of another person.
That's not even to mention all the cocaine and hardcore street drugs drifting around most communities these days.
I do have to say, I believe that hard drugs would be an exponentially smaller an issue if marijuana was legalized and our Canadian Criminal Code, and Justice Systems were reformed to reflect that of a working, productive society. Nevertheless, The situation is what it is.
People still smoke cigarettes. This used to absolutely confound me, although I know understand it for what it is. The only single loophole for which service staff  are able to walk away from a service job shift for 10 minutes and breath.
I now at least appreciate how people could smoke.
I was recently told that France has way more Smokers than The U.S, but on average the people there are much healthier. They attribute the difference to Diet. With rampant obesity on the rise, it's not news that food is a drug to a lot of us, and abused actively and aggressively.
My name is April. and I'm addicted to food.
Alcohol kills foolish amounts of people between impaired drivers and personal alcohol abuse.
Even worse than that is how many legally obtained Prescription Drugs are abused by either their intended, or an unintended user, every single day in Canada.
How many people standing at that Methadone Clinic, you look down your nose at, as you drive to work, are in line because at , they got they hurt, and saw a lazy doctor who was too willing to write a prescription to a hard working good person.
Everyone has pain that they are dealing with. or not dealing with.
This bears repeating.
Every single person has known pain.
If you were bullied, or had less than perfect parents. If you had a toxic, dishonest, self destructive relationship, that left you very insecure. If you struggle with Depression, Anxiety, Loss, Fear or Pain of any kind, it is very unfortunate that you went through that.
Getting through pain, is not an easy thing to do.
You, however, are not special.
Everyone goes through struggles, it's on you to work through it and get over it, or let it ruin your life.
Why does self destruction feel so good?
Why do we all do it.
Everyone gets to make the choices in their life, whether they are good choices that improve it, or bad choices that make their lives unnecessarily difficult.
Who could blame anyone for wanting a break from that to feel good about ourselves?
We all find ways to feel good. Especially when we don't.
So who, but the utterly arrogant, who would assume that it is their business to judge another person for the way they find, to feel good?
It's said that People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones
I just Don't think you should ever under estimate the force of the wind you're throwing them into.

What Really Matters

When my grandfather passed away I had lived through my first semester of University. 3 hours away from where I had grown up as a very sheltered, admittedly ignorant of life experience or maturity.
He was a lot of different things. he'd lived a lot of different versions of himself. Before I was born he had a problem with alcohol. when my father was a child, alcoholism was legitimately a life choice, where I'm from.
After a long time of being very unhappy, and abusing himself with alcohol, he realized how unhappy he made my grand mother and their two children, he stopped all that. Turned over a new leaf and became an entirely different version of himself. A man that I grew up with, who made jokes, and liked cartoons. Who always had candy, and some time for being silly with a child.
When I was a teenage my grand father got cancer. Sadly, there is nothing unique in that sentence. Hundreds of people, lose their loved ones to Cancer every day. It is soul crushing, to continue on filling the space in your heart left by a human being, with a handful of memories. memory is truly bittersweet in that it is always telling us that we can never go backwards.
I an a very fortunate person. My grand father went through radiation treatments. He got very very sick, and then he got better. He came home. He drove me home every single time i went for a run, stopped into his home for a glass of water, and didn't want to run home. The day he left my hometown, to come to the city, for his treatments, My Grand father smoked his last cigarette. He said, "Well that's it", and threw half a pack, into the garbage can. To this day, my grand mother swears that he never touched one again
But in 2008, after my first semester away from home, separated from my family, figuring out what was important to me, my grand father got very sick. he was gone within 72 hours. A few years before, he had undergone a hernia operation. Complications had caused him to quietly, painlessly and quickly, slip away from us.
When my grand mother brought home his clothing from the hospital, she emptied his pockets. for some reason, I took the money left there. some change, nothing bigger than a quarter.
I brought it home and put it in a black silk bag.
I never understood what it meant to me. I often wondered if it meant I was a material person. Was I a bad person, because I couldn't find any significance in anything other than money and stuff?
Today I understand what it means to me. As I clean my house on a rainy Sunday, I find my little black silk bag, behind a photograph of my younger brother. My Grandfather, My dad and my brother all share a lot of common features. so it seemed appropriate to keep family together.
Today I know why I kept the money. Not for the value, but for the symbol. The most valuable thing my grandfather has given me, is humility, awareness, and a willingness to start over.
Both literally, and metaphorically, I kept the closest thing I possible could. I kept Change.

I could very well, become an adult, soon.

So yesterday I learned what it was to be in a situation where you "Can't Even".
This was always an odd thing to me. I never understood why an inability to articulate the language you should know, "off by heart", as they say, became a thing to encourage.
But yesterday, I had such a day, that I am sure that I could not find the words to articular my frustration properly, and so I couldn't even...
Now, as unnerving as THAT was
This evening, I experienced what I understand to be "fangirling" when I tweeted something positive to Sarah Blackwood, in support of her current upset with United Airlines. Not particularly known for their caliber of customer satisfaction. way less stoked for my trip to New York this summer. But I digress.
I send a positive message with a silly video. I am such a fan of this girl. I used to love The Creepshow, a Toronto band, when she was their vocalist. I fell away from their music but I became such a giant fan of her projects and her as a person, and a women role model for people to look up to. Walk Off The Earth have some of my favorite videos on the whole internet. Their music is creative, and honest and so full of innovation that I'm considering leaving Newfoundland just to see them perform live somewhere in Canada soon.
Granted the picture of three baby goats, wearing sweaters and making precious sounds, did the majority of the work, She favorited my tweets. She retweeted my tweets. I shreked like a 4 year old, with a set of car keys dangling above my heads. Attention! from someone I admire!! Just bliss.
Is it possible that I'm slowly starting to understand how to relax and behave like a normal human being...? I'm not sure how I feel about this to be honest...

Motivate Me.

Things aren't going as well as I would have hoped.
I'm not yet in a position to advance aspects of my life to a point where I want them to be. It's getting very difficult to be positive, because I've been given a few extra obstacles in the last year. Things I can't control or stop from happening.
That's probably one of the most frustrating things you can possibly go through. To know something makes you unhappy and still have to watch it happen to you, and live through it, with no real way of recovering the loss.
Maybe that's just another reason I'm really messed up, but sometimes people are too insecure and ignorant to know any better. Sometimes people do rude things like point out mistakes or flaws in other people, to feel good about themselves. Sometimes, people are just so unable to cope with life like everyone else, that they become very self centered and don't know when they are neglecting to treat people around them the ways we all deserve. People who are so unhappy with themselves that it makes them insecure and incapable of being happy for another person. Everyone has had that one friend or roommate that was just impossible to be around sometimes. If they are having a bad day everyone around them is too. Even if your having a good day, these people will belittle you and make you feel low. It's not their fault. They can't accept your happiness as anything other than a personal insult. Their happiness is all about themselves, so you need to make sure you're not wasting your happiness on someone who is just not worth it.
Sometimes we get so invested in something (a job, a relationship, a hobby, or a project) that we're motivated to work harder toward our own goals that we forget other people don't want to hear all about us all day long.
We all have a point and time when someone should take us aside and tell us that the world does not revolve around us.
I believe that we've become a society of self reflection. We all spend so much time in our own heads going over and over conversations that happen. and things that might happen. and what we will say if someone does something to us. Probably more so than all those we spend hours in our own heads saying all the things we wished we had. We all wish we were confident, direct and secure. So maybe we should all stop worrying about everyone else's downfalls, and realize that we need to work on ourselves.

Speaking Greek

I've failed on the blog front pretty bad. Boyfriend is out of the province and I promised myself I would make use of the time alone to change some things that I want to. I've put a lot of time into work and its really paying off. I've been eating really well, and getting a mild amount of exercise and as a result, I am feeling pretty great too.
I guess I find it easier to writing, when I'm unhappy. Complaining comes more naturally to me I guess.
Not that, that makes me any different, I'm sure it's a general humanity kind of thing.
I'm thinking of trying to learn Greek with Rosetta Stone. I work in a Greek restaurant for Greek people. If that weren't enough of a reason to learn a new language, Boyfriend and I are planning a trip to Greece in the near future. Just seems like something that will make my life easier in the future.

Now some ask.fm Answers

These are actual answers submitted by teens and young adults to questions on Ask.fm I believe that adding positive actions to any situation makes it better so I want to highlight some of the amazing statements given to an anonymous question.

Q. What do you think of all the haters that use Ask.fm? do you pay any attention?

*They all have their own issues they need to deal with. So they take it out on other people. It's like the popular girls at school that are mean to everyone. They're insecure and think little of themselves but come down on everyone else just so they can put themselves up on a pedestal. I on the other hand don't do that. I try to be really nice to other people

Q. If you knew someone was doing wrong and hurting someone, would you reveal their identity

*yes (3)

*Probably (5)

*of course (1)

It's good to know that somewhere out there parents are still raising and taking responsibility for good children who will grow up and be good people.

The Questions keep coming :)

All anons this week! Keep the questions and shares coming! I love it!

how do you handle creative blocks? what do you recommend to someone who feels stifled in their creative endeavors but wishes to overcome these?

I think the first thing to decide is what is stifling you in the first place. What is it that you want to say, and why can't you just say it. Everyone needs an outlet for self expression and creativity, but it's up to you to find your means of expressing yourself, in a way that makes you happy without interfering with other people. I personally don't put pressure on myself to create at all. When something inspires me to write, I express what I have to say about the topic. If someone asks me a question I will respond in the best way that I know how. You cannot force creativity. it must come from an organic desire to express oneself. Find what inspires you and express it, as long as you're not interfering with, or abusing other people in the process. Nobody's happiness is worth the suffering of another person, your personal feelings are irrelevant

If you had to live the rest of your life in a movie which one would you pick?

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist.

How do you deal with liars?

The funny thing about liars is often they are not smart enough to not get caught. So they get caught and have to lie in the bed they made for themselves

Kid Rant

I'm so bloody sick and tired of people using the word Bully. I hate it. It's a scapegoat to hide behind, and a poor excuse to escape taking ownership of a lack of parenting.
I think that everything is just to easy now. I was bullied as a child. Like most people. It's a natural part of life to meet with aggression at some points and to learn how to deal with it. Kids will be kids. It's up to parents to be parents.
If your kid is being bullied on the internet, then she needs to not be on the internet. You can't control everyone that your child comes in contact. and you can let them run off on their own to fall on their face all the time. Reason would say that at some point you have to stop letting "your" iPad occupy your children, while the internet raises them and you watch dancing with the stars.
There were on computers when I was born. At some point in grade school we got one, and later on moved onto having the internet and limited internet time. the key word there LIMITED I was allowed to be on the computer for 1 hour.
There is no point in lying, I found some bad stuff on the internet. Natural curiosity is going to cause anyone to go looking for something thought to be taboo, for any number of reasons.  But I was raised actively by two parents who spent time with me. They taught me right from wrong, so when I saw an ad that was bad, seemed like a virus or was just plain lewd, I simply viewed it as a waste of time. vulgarity was always something my mother repulsed. to this day she does not swear and scolds my 27 year old self every time I curse in her presence. I suppose in a lot of ways I had it easy. There was no internet to isolate me. and when there was, my parents had a problem with it.
It bothers me to see parents handing off their cellphone or tablet and letting the child stare, poking a touchscreen the entire time they are in a restaurant.  It is not a tool to allow parents to act as though they didn't choose to become parents. It's a full-time job being a parent. It takes a lot of work. If you want a night off (as I'll be the first to say, any parent is entitled to) get a sitter and enjoy a night alone.  If you want to have family dinner leave all the electronics at home and spend a couple of hours with your kids.  Please don't let the internet raise your kids. It will make them stupid and obese and disappointments to you, and everyone else.
It's a task that I know, myself, I am not up to. I'm not cut out to be a parent at all, and I believe that if more people took that notion more seriously, and assessed if they were or were not able to raise a child properly, and took the proper intelligent, well known, correct methods to protect themselves, we wouldn't have such an over populated social service system, to be so underfunded. We can't increase budgets with money that we do not have. We have to decrease need to lighten the load on everything.

Ask.Fm inspired post.

Ask.Fm asks:
What scares you more than anything else?

I think being alone is what I am most afraid of. Not on a day to day basis. I really enjoy spending some time alone. But my biggest fear is having every relationship not work out, and ending up alone, without love. Some relationships just don't work out. Some people are just too different or need different things out of life. It isn't anyone's fault if they aren't exactly what YOU need. As much as it really sucks a lot of the time, There is nothing you can do about that except get over it and move on. But I digress. Not having a partner, to share my life with, scares me the most.

Ask.FM Traffic

Anon Question: "What advice would you give to guys who want to try and know a pretty lady intimately,mentally and physically, without coming off too aggressive, or too passive"

#HTM: First of all, Be Honest. Look at the situation objectively. Is this person in a relationship already? Do you think that they share your feelings? Do you really know them or are you just too excited about a little crush? Be mature and up front with her. She deserves to know your feelings but its not up to her to make you happy. Sometimes things work out better than you had hoped. But sometimes it doesn't work out at all the way you want, and all you can do is get over it and move on, in search of happiness for yourself.

Orange Leaves, and Hoodie Sleeves

I'm having a lot of trouble writing again. I suppose to don't really have that much to say. I've been working as much as possible and had a lovely, eventful Thanksgiving Weekend. (Canadian Thanksgiving, Obviously)

I've been working as much as possible and I'm finally seeing it pay off. I'm finally starting to get ahead, and the optimism it's given me is like being revived. For a long time I thought it was impossible to advance or get ahead. A lot of set backs had me very discouraged. But I'm getting there and it's a fantastic feeling. Making Headway. I'm starting to think that life is really all about the little things. I see retirement commercials telling me to spend my youth working all day every day so I can be rich when I'm 65 and falling apart. I don't see value in that. I think we should work hard some time and relax, play and enjoy our lives some time. I'd rather have a lifetime of memories when I'm 65. Not disposable income.
To be life is about all the stuff that happens in between. The Bar-B-Q's and Halloween parties and softball games and New Years. Life loses it's luster and excitement when you look at it like it's 75+ years. It's 39 000 000 Moments. The only determining factor is your own potential for happiness, and how you choose to remember all those moments.

This change on outlook has really helped me to keep things in prospective. This was a massive positive change that adds to my happiness and mental health.

Another exciting thing that has happened is that Friends of mine got engaged last weekend. and She asked me to be her maid of honor. I'm kind of a control freak, I really enjoy planning and organizing and designing and being very hands on in endeavors. This will be a challenge for me to not take over. But I'm very excited to do all the M.O.H. duties. I just don't really know what they are yet.

human facepalm

I was so impressed by you.

I wanted you to think that I was funny, or smart or clever and see something in me that you wanted. I've never had any issue attracting men. Men much more successful, better looking, smarter and a hell of a lot smoother than you. So why did I need you to like me so bad? you never even treated me very well, and sex with you allowed me to make many a grocery list in my head. You made no effort because you probably didn't care if I liked you or not. You loved you enough for both of us.
The worst part I was completely crushed when you wanted to stop seeing me, saying you gave it a shot and I just was not special.
Now, looking back on all of that I feel very stupid. I wasted so much time on you. Reading your stupid, masturbatory blog, and watching you ruin stand up shows, and bomb performances, out of laziness and a spoiled, self important attitude. You want all of the things your friends and family have, without having to give any respect, care, concern or work to get them. Life simply doesn't work that way.
You were a bad boyfriend, but I'm fairly sure that is because you are a spoiled, thoughtless, self centered person. I should be able to tie this into "you can't make a ho a housewife" somehow but I just can't seem to get there right now. One of these days maybe I'll edit this.

It's hilarious to see you anywhere in public, like this morning, desperately trying to act like you don't notice anything or anyone around you, even though you had the foresight to get as far away from me as possible and hide behind a rack of motor oil. Overkill much?
Much less is the fact that I actually paid attention to you, when you talked, and I understand that you wouldn't even know what to look for in an automotive section anywhere. Yet another flaw in your lack of a personality
The worst part about being really smart (government tested and proven "gifted intelligence" thank you very much) is when you see other people who really think they are. They never seem to have the intelligence to recognize courtesy, compassion or good manners as valuable things. Like being smart entitles you to being a rude, obnoxious jackass. In actually its an abundance of ignorance makes someone so uncouth and repulsive.* Not intelligence.
For a really long I thought about you. and obsessed about what was wrong with me. The only thing wrong with me is that I didn't walk away from you sooner then you made me. I didn't love myself enough to know you were a total waste of time. But now I do, so thank you for a lesson learned the hard way.

*There is nothing less attractive than rude, ignorant behavior. Joking at someone's expense, Correcting people in front of friends, or picking fights with other people around. You're a neanderthal and it's hideous. Stop cutting down others to make up for your own shortcoming. it's very transparent and pathetic.

Bookmark Added.

I just came upon what I think is a fascinating discovery. In very broad terms, this is what happens in every single fight I've ever had with the opposite sex.

I'm pissed off. and even though I'm an intelligent human being who is fully aware that I'm being insecure and am probably blatantly wrong, I don't want the blame right away.
At the moment, that I am mad, I want to feel like it is not my fault. and that everyone sucks except me. It doesn't matter what the issue is. Shut up, I know that was a yield sign. I already feel stupid. I know my friend will be my friend again in an hour. Right now it will make me feel better to hear someone else confirming that She's wrong and I'm right.

I think I realized that we don't need you to fix it. You want to fix it because in your boy brain, that seems to be the best thing to do. As far as instincts go, I personally think it's endearing to want to save or or fix something. But, in reality, when you do try to fix it, it makes us feel like we can't do it ourselves and some of us don't like that, so we get defensive, but you can't figure out why because you're just trying to help.
In our own languages, we both know whats wrong, we just have different ways of helping each other.

Now if only I understood men, this whole puzzle will be a little easier...

Chris Rock know's what I'm talking about

just words. pick your favorites and express yourself.

I read somewhere that love is giving another human being the ability to completely crush you and destroy your heart. and trusting them not to. I know a lot of people struggle with saying the words. and I think it's because love means something different to everyone.
We're all such amazingly unique human beings. Nobody feels exactly the same way about their significant other as everyone else. we all appreciate and value different things, and therefore see different values in love.
It's a natural (train of) thought to expect your version of love from someone else. We all know how we express ourselves and show love. So we look for those same actions and expressions from the people we're expressing our love for.
Completely natural, but hopelessly impossible. Expectations that you have of how someone should express their feelings for you is impractical. It's only going to cause hurt feelings, tension, resentment, and communication problems which unravel a perfectly amazing relationship.
The "honeymoon" phase doesn't end independently when it feels like it. we kill it. When we try to make someone define how they feel about us, it can only be in their own words and actions. If someone is treating you by standards that you've outlined for them, you'll never trust that it's true or real.
When someone expresses THEMSELVES, in their own way, to show you what you mean to them it means more to you then any Disney movie or Sex and the City season can outrageously glamorize

I never talk about my relationship. But it's too good of an example to not use.
I love bad movies. mostly if they involve dinosaurs, or mega sharks. Mutant animals returning to Battle Mega Shark, such as Crocosaurus or Giant Octopus. Over the top, low budget, Animal Attack movies. I f**king love them. nothing on film or T.V. brings me so much hilarious enjoyment.

Yesterday boyfriend PVR'd Sharknado for me. and was super excited to show me. I know full well that this action does not say "love" to 90% of you, but just the thought is amazing. He was scrolling through channels and saw something that I would really enjoy. I was at work and wouldn't be home for hours so he made sure I didn't miss it. Knowing someone else has that kind of concern for the simple things that make you happy, and wanting so badly for you to have everything in the world.

That means more to me than any foolish Disney Prince or lavish vacation with Mr Big. Those things aren't real. What's real is having someone in your life who wants to be there and be happy with you, and even when you're completely insane (comes with the territory of owning ovaries) you argue and have really shitty times. but you get through it and you're happy again. THAT is Love to me. and it makes me happy. So what else can you ask for?

Well I don't really have any friends. That would be nice too if I got to have two things that would make me happy.

job hunt revival

So after a couple of weeks of working 4 hour shifts and wasting a lot of my time. The health food store tells me that I'm not a good fit and they wont be asking me to work any more shifts. I'm a lovely person though. Lovely enough to pay me little to nothing and waste my time, while bills pile up and debts increase. I guess the lesson I should be learning from this is "people who treat others that way with such little regard on not people I want to work for. She also emailed me at 6pm on a Sunday. Professional I know. Not even enough regard to have a phone call about it. I know I should be happy that they made their treatment of people clear before I was committed to that place, and they probably did me a favor. but right now I'm just upset and being a girl about it for a day. I'm at a total loss for what I did wrong. I loved it there. I loved helping customers and my favorite thing to do to pass the time was to put away all the stock so my pregnant boss didn't have to. I still have no idea what I did wrong. I was 20 minutes early most days. parked in the parking lot waiting for the owner to get there. One day I was late because Bagel Cafe tool a long time to bring us our food/bill. and I called her right away and apologized profusely and it was the only time I've ever been anything other than early.

Now the job hunt continues. The bills aren't going anywhere. I really loved my last bar tending job. but a difficult manager made it a less than good situation. I wish I could go back there. the staff there were my friends and I liked them

Ask Me Anything!

If you have anything that you would like to read about, or any questions. something to personal to ask someone close to you, or something about me that you want to know more about. If you've shared a similar experience or learned a lesson the hard way, share with me. Ask me anything on Ask.fm. The little box is right there on your left. Remain anonymous or make an account and join in the conversation. I set up the account to help people. Negativity never gets a reaction, but the only stupid questions are the ones you never ask. Sometimes a little bit of time (and age) teaches you a lot that you can share to help someone else. So speak up. Help yourself or someone else. I can't fix our passive, crumbling society all by myself :p

Get some coffee. This one goes on awhile...

Over the course of the last few days I've realized a lot of things. Most of which was in large part to an article shared on my Facebook called "10 Things You Learn In Your 20's"
I do strongly recommend giving it a look if you are in your mid (to late :/) 20's. This article is a quick read, and holds a lot of truth, to be honest. Through reading this, I started comparing it to my life, and my current frustrations regarding my work/career. So I set out to talk to my friends, my partner, and my mother (The Holy Trinity of advice/calling me on my bullshit).

But I had a preconceived notion in my head that just working in the mall somewhere made me a loser. and granted, if I was beginning at entry level, minimum wage, working in the food court, at my age, Yes, I would have to agree that I'd have screwed the pouch on a lot of major life choices.

But I'm from the TGIF generation. Boy Meet's World, Family Matters, The Fresh Prince, The Simpsons* and later on Sabrina The Teenage Witch and Teen Angel, taught me about morals and values and respect, So I understand that my education is valuable and I have a lot of amazing job experience, and am more than qualified to begin in lower or middle management.

Reading about the 10 things I should have learned, Number 5 really spoke to my recent career stresses and doubts.

"5. People are pretentious about jobs."

and here is the twist! You didn't see this coming I bet.

I realized that nobody in my life was putting that pressure on me.
My mom just wanted me to be happy.
My boyfriend's only advice to me ever is to make sure that I was happy. It's amazing how much it improves your perspective, when you have someone in your life, who is completely devoted to your happiness together. It's a feeling that I will truly never forget. That is love in my opinion. That level of devotion for another human being. Wanting another human being to be happy that badly.

At the end of the day it was my own presumptions and judgments that I was thinking about. Not any of my loved ones. None of my friends would ever judge me for being happy at a job. that's why they're my friends and I love them more than anything. I don't have many close friends but I greatly value the few that I have.

I've decided to leave my high paying Insurance Sales Job, for something less aggressive I have several interviews for management positions for clothing stores and restaurants. Hindsight allows me to realize that I was happiest and really enjoyed going to work, when I was working with people, in the retail industry, so I'm going back to a retail position where I can advance and take pride in the work that I do, while I enjoy doing it. I think you need to measure the amount of money you need to be happy, against how much bullshit you are willing to take at a job. It's just a job. it doesn't define you. It just pays the bills, and the fact is you're going to spend most of your life there, so it may as well be something that you enjoy. I enjoy retail. So the job hunt continues! I'm going to blog the whole job hunt process I think.

Today I have an interview at 3pm for an assistant manager position. there are two openings. I look young, so it's difficult to appear mature, without looking like I'm playing dress up with my mom's clothes, but little things help.
Wearing your hair in a mature style
Wearing lipstick in a conservative shade, not lip gloss.
Go easy on the makeup. it's bad for your skin, and makes you look really insecure and superficial.
Wear comfortable shoes. If you aren't comfortable, you aren't relaxed and performing at the level your capable of (that one goes for all aspects of life, actually.)

Ask.fm: Scary Experience

What has been the scariest experience in your life?

Coming home from England, (the most amazing trip of my life), to find out that they were waiting for me to come back to have tests done for cancer. I had tests done before my trip and they came back with some questionable results over the 2 months I was gone. The worst part of the whole thing was that nobody in my family would tell me about my results. I knew nothing at all until I got off a plane, and my mom told me i had to leave university and go back to Grand Falls-Windsor where a specialist was waiting for me to do biopsies and other invasive, uncomfortable tests. I know that my family didnt want to ruin my trip. They didn't want me to be on another continent and worried about things I couldn't control. But this is something that I still struggle with because I'm the kind of person who would want to know. and they know that, and unfortunately it's something that has affected my trust with several people because.

Lucky I was and still am cancer free, and a lot of people don't get so lucky. But that was easily the scariest experience of my life.

Ask.fm BOOK!

Can you recommend anything to read?

Yes!!! reading plays is getting to be a big hobby again. despite how much I hate it when I was in Theatre school. All the major plays by Anton Chekov, Like The Seagull, The Cherry Orchard, and Uncle Vanya are fantastic. I also have a serious guilty pleasure in the Dan Brown books. Angels and Demons, The Da Vinci Code, Digital Fortress, and Deception Point. Seven Plays by Same Shepard, as well as anything by Eugene O'neill. I also own all of these among tons more books if you life in my area/know me and want to borrow one