Sunday 17 February 2013

You probably think this rant is about you

If you've ever catered to a self involved friend, been the adult for your own parent, dated a man child, or had some other person thrust their responsibilities/need onto you you may appreciate this rant. I've needed to get it off my chest for a long time.

We are all responsible for our own happiness. Every human being has the same needs for happiness.
Most of us work very hard, for a long time, and go through a lot of shitty things, and do a lot of jobs we hate, and miss fun nights out making memories with our friends, because we are adults and we have jobs, and it's not the end of the world if we miss one hangover. Not in a legitimate pursuit of happiness.
Most of us go through post secondary education of some kind, because we know we have to put that work in, just like everyone else if we want a more comfortable life down the road.
Most of us have had our heart broken, Been betrayed by someone who meant a lot to us. Some of us struggle with security issues because of poorly handled issues in our past, and still, we carry on in search of love, and companionship and someone to spend our lives with. Looking for that perfect person that you can completely be yourself with for the rest of your life.

So how is it that the self important, juvenile, insecurity ridden, neanderthal still walks the earth? How does one human being manage to slip through that many cracks? We have all experienced one of these people. They thrive on negativity as a means of boosting their ego.

Eg. Girls who weigh less than mannequins saying they are fat, just so people will reassure them that they are beautiful and perfect. Now don't get you're Birkenstock's in a twist, ladies, I'm fully aware of psychological illnesses which give women altered perceptions about how they do/should look. I'm not an idiot. but neither are you. We all know at least one of these girls.
It doesn't make them the scum of the earth. They need to take pride in something and they feel their looks are their strongest assets. I would want to make a person like that feel really smart, so they would take pride in their brain.
Another brutal example is the partner who has trust issues, because his first girlfriend ever cheated on him and he never got over it. Or because her best friend stole her boyfriend so all girls are bitches. Or the guy who tells women that all women cheat and lie and all that disrespectful bullshit.*
That guy hating on his girlfriend and saying she's going to leave him, might be terrified that she is going to find someone better, may he is scared that she'll laugh at him, so he will say he doesn't care if she does, so he'll be winning...somehow?
Maybe that girl is really scared of being mistreated by women, so she guards herself. As if calling yourself a bitch doesn't hurt just as much as someone else saying it to/about you. But if she says it first, and they think that she doesn't care, then maybe nobody will think she's a bitch at all. Maybe they will respect that she thinks for herself and doesn't have any time for fake bullshit, and see what a nice person she is. Or maybe they'll just call her a bitch. Who knows really.
That guy just wants security to know nobody is going to take advantage of him. and that girl wants to have something to take pride in. Something that she really cares about, and takes seriously. To do some good, and have some fun.

*Girls, if you are staying with someone who speaks to you with disrespect, you're just as stupid and ignorant as your redneck/skeet dude boyfriend. Enabling him is not going to make it better. People rarely change on their own. They generally have to lose the things most dear to them to realize what they are doing to the people around them.

Everyone needs something to be proud of. Confidence is a vital need for every single person. Not to be confused with arrogance, a confident person is self assured and comfortable. Open to debate in which new ideas may be exchanged and adopted. The way our whole world moves forward.
If you don't have something that brings you happiness and stress release, then what is the point of living? Find something that makes you happy. Something positive, not drinking or drugs, because that's what you see on tv, and it's dramatic and will make people worry about you. . Grow up and face the issues that make you unhappy like an adult. Everyone deserves to be happy. and we're all responsible for ourselves.

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